As you might now if you follow my private account, I LOVE to work out. I mean, I do sports four to five times a week. Why? Because I love it.

Did I start because I wanted to change my body? Absolutely YES. Do I think that’s kinda fucked up? A MILLION TIMES YES!

 The more work I do with These Girls, the deeper I get with questioning what we’ve been taught all our lives and the more I question my own motivations to do certain things. Like working out. When I talk to other women, I often hear that they are working out to look a specific way on a certain occasion. Same goes for dieting. My opinion: Girl, you are actively bullying yourself and others and contributing to the wrongful standards of our fatphobic society that ultimately harm everyone. 

Don’t get me wrong, we are all free to do whatever we want with our bodies. But when we set ourselves so called “fitness goals” we’re setting us up for failure (same goes for dieting, but I will get into that in another Real Talk). First of all, ask yourself: Will I stop once I reached my goal? What if I never even reach my goal? Am I doing this for me myself and I? Working out with the main motivation of changing your body is simply not sustainable or healthy. The point of frustration will come, if it’s all about losing weight or getting more ass, etc. – that’s inevitable. If you follow a fitness influencer because you want her body, just don’t, press that unfollow button. Because the truth is, you will never have that body. All our bodies are set up differently and that’s more than perfect. The problem is the pressure to give in to the beauty standard of the moment. And if you do that, we won’t move forward. Why?

Instead of celebrating and being in awe of our amazing differences we’re working towards the same, twisted, fantasy body, that excludes most people completely and that makes us constantly feel bad about ourselves. We’re implying that something about our bodies is not right.

With this I am not saying you shouldn’t work out. Trust me, I love it and I’m all for it, if it feels right. Because, there’s plenty really good reasons to work out:

  • Work out, if you feel happy afterwards!

  • Work out, if you actually enjoy the workout! If you can’t wait for your workout each week, that’s the way to go.

  • Work out, if it makes you feel strong and powerful and like you can handle whatever shit life throws at you.

  • Work out, if you feel a stronger connection to your body through it.

  • Work out, if it’s good for your mental health.

  • Work out, if it helps you focus.

  • Work out, if it makes you forget everything else around you.

  • Work out, if you can build connections with others.

  • Work out, if it’s your favorite definition of me time.

The list goes on and on – and as you can see, the reasons have nothing to do with your physical appearance. If you check your body in the mirror five times a day and get upset if you see a little roll over your pants, you are harming yourself. You’re bullying yourself. and yes, you’re being absolutely irrational, because you’re trained to be like that.

If you start working out or if you’re already working out, make it a point not to obsess about your body shape.

Don’t set yourself goals like “loose 5kg or go below 20 per cent body far” or any of that crap. You can only loose. Whatever happens with your body in the process will happen. And that’s how it’s supposed to be. It took me forever to realize that! And yes, I’m still happy if I can see an ab, but I also don’t care if I don’t. Me and you are worth so much more than our appearance. We are good the way we are. 

Try to free yourself from the toxic beauty standards. Unfollow people that make you feel bad about your body. Follow people who make you feel amazing about yourself! Let’s try to change, what’s considered beautiful or desirable instead of changing our bodies, because ultimately we’re just poisoning ourselves. So please – stop thinking that you need to change. Your body is beautiful no matter the size and look of it and deserves all the goodness and love in the world – especially from yourself.


by Jana